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QUOTE OF THE DAY: ‘What Is Heterosexual Grooming?’

Writer Allegra Hirschman wrote a satirical essay for HuffPost about “attempting to raise my kids as homosexuals.”


The article ran Saturday under the headline “I’m Trying To Raise My Kids As Homosexuals (And I Never Even Have To Say ‘Gay’).”

  • “How am I attempting to raise my kids as homosexuals, you ask? Well, it’s simple: I learned how from watching straight people enforce a sexual orientation on their children without ever saying ‘straight,'” Hirschman wrote.
  • Hirschman described straight couples as practicing “heterosexual grooming,” “a set of practices and expectations based on a child’s assigned gender at birth, which promotes the formation of a romantic and possessive relationship between ‘opposite sex’ children and their parents.”
  • By contrast, she said, in her gay marriage: “We’re doing whatever we can to encourage [our young son’s] gayness ― like only letting him listen to show tunes and Britney Spears (no ‘Baby Shark’ for our little queerspawn) ― and we’re crossing our fingers that all this hard work will pay off.”
  • “I wrote this piece as satire to make a point ― even if my wife and I actually spent every waking moment trying to force a ‘gay agenda’ on our kids, they may still turn out straight. But that’s not what any of this is really about,” Hirshman said, referring to Florida’s new “Don’t Say Gay” law.
  • “The truth is, growing up in a world where you don’t see examples of yourself because everything systemically favors straight and cis people ― or where people like you are erased or barred from being taught about in schools ― has consequences.”

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